Friday, August 15, 2008

The Gospel of the flying spaghetti monster : Bobby henderson

As noted elsewhere by me, one of the signs that a person is too religious is a lack of sense of humour (and its cousin irony ) as well as the inability to recognise sarcasm. It should come as no surprise that this book which uses humour, irony and sarcasm as it's chief tools to make a point will be ignored by the people who should read this book. Written primarily as a means of countering the Intelligent design supporters, indeed the genesis(heh) of the book is a letter written by the author to the Kansas school board (when they were considering teaching Intelligent Design in school) , this book has in my opinion , devastating arguments against the teaching of Intelligent Design. It states that not only was evolution guided by an intelligent designer, they also do know the identity of the Intelligent Designer, ta dah- The flying spaghetti monster. And in doing so they neatly counter every argument put forth by the Intelligent Designers ,including Sen. John McCain. For e.g. McCain : Every point of view must be taught in school. Therefore we should teach children that a flying spaghetti monster designed us is a theory.
Full of pun's (the followers are called pastafarians and say RAmen after a prayer), this book is a hoot. While taking on the Intelligent Designers, the pastafarians also take on my favorite targets - religious fundamentalists. And they do it with their own tools.
For e.g.
How convincing is this argument to you?
P1. The Flying Spaghetti Monster is a being which has every perfection.
P2. Existence is a perfection.
C. Therefore, the Flying Spaghetti Monster exists.
Not convinced? Well tell that to St Anselm.(this is his argument for the existence of God , replace FSM with God)

And what does their religion stand for? Everything that is good.
and what is their religion against? Everything that isnt good.
Funny no? But everyone does believe this about their religion.

And also a set of commandments or eight I rather wish you didnt, reproduced here because people should compare with their own religions set of rules and think which one is better


I'd Really Rather You Didn't Act Like A Sanctimonious Holier-Than-Thou Ass When Describing My Noodly Goodness. If Some People Don't Believe In Me, That's Okay. Really, I'm Not That Vain. Besides, This Isn't About Them So Don't Change The Subject.

I'd Really Rather You Didn't Use My Existence As A Means To Oppress, Subjigate, Punish, Eviscerate, And/Or, You Know, Be Mean To Others. I Dont Require Sacrifices, And Purity Is For Drinking Water, Not People.

I'd Really Rather You Didn't Judge People For The Way They Look, Or How They Dress, Or The Way They Talk, Or, Well, Just Play Nice, Okay? Oh, And Get This Through You Thick Heads: Woman=Person, Man=Person. Samey-Samey. One is Not Better Than The Other, Unless We're Talking About Fashion And I'm Sorry, But I Gave That To Women And Some Guys Who Know The Difference Between Teal And Fuchsia.

I'd Really Rather You Didn't Indulge In Conduct That Offends Yourself, Or Your Willing, Consenting Partner Of Legal Age AND Mental Maturity. As For Anyone Who Might Object, I Think The Expression Is Go F*** Yourself, Unless They Find That Offensive In Which Case They Can Turn Off The TV For Once And Go For A Walk For A Change.

I'd Really Rather You Didn't Challenge The Bigoted, Misogynist, Hateful Ideas Of Others On An Empty Stomach. Eat, Then Go After The B*******.

I'd Really Rather You Didn't Build MultiMillion-Dollar Churches/Temples/Mosques/ Shrines To My Noodly Goodness When The Money Could Be Better Spent (Take Your Pick): A. Ending Poverty B. Curing Diseases C. Living In Peace, Loving With Passion, And Lowering The Cost Of Cable. I Might Be A Complex Carbohydrate Omniscient Being, But I Enjoy The Simple Things In Life. I Ought To Know. I AM The Creator.

I'd Really Rather You Didn't Go around Telling People I Talk To you. You're Not That Interesting. Get Over Yourself. And I Told You To Love Your Fellow Man, Can't You Take A Hint?

I'd Really Rather You Didn't Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You If You Are Into, Um, Stuff That Uses Alot Of Leather/Lubrication/Las Vegas. If The Other Person Is Into It However (Pursuant To #4), Then Have At It, Take Pictures, And For The Love Of Mike, Wear A CONDOM! Honestly It's A Piece Of Rubber, If I Didn't Want It To Feel Good When You Did It I Would Have Added Spikes, Or Something.

Unfortunately though, the only people who would get a good laugh from reading this book are people like me